A Quick Change
by Deaddlykissesno3
Summary: I tried to find a way to get John into those nice leathery outfits that the wraith wear. This is what came up with far too much tea, lack of food and very little sleep.


TITLE: A Quick Change

TITLE: A Quick Change  
AUTHOR: Me, dragontamerno3, Steffy  
RATING: PG  
FANDOM: Stargate Atlantis  
PAIRING: none... I might add a bit on to it later (I'll tell you if I do) to make it McKay/Shep because I can totally see that happening.  
TIMELINE: None  
WORD COUNT: 723  
DISCLAIMER: Not mine.

All four team members were running for their lives, with the wraith hot on their tails. Rodney had point, or at least it would seem they way he was running, screaming and firing. Darts flew over their heads, though they were certain that the darts where going to the city and not looking for them. Suddenly Rodney stopped and began backing up.

"What is that thing?" He squeaked as a bug, about the size of a bear, started crawling towards them slowly. This large bug looked like a potato bug from Hell.

"You don't want to know." Teyla answered as she started shooting at it. After several rounds from her P-90, it stopped its progress and she ran around it. Rodney paused for a second until it twitched before quickly passing the woman to head back towards the gate.

Ronon made it to the gate first and dialed the gate as quickly as he could. Teyla and Rodney ran through quickly followed by Ronon. Only then, once back on Atlantis and safe from their attackers did they realize that John was not with them.

John wasn't watching where he was going as he continued to fire at the wraith so when he suddenly ran into something he fell to the ground a bit dazed. At first he noticed that he was covered in some kind of thick… goop. Slowly, dreading what he was going to find, he lifted his head to come face to face with the potato bug thing. As the bug leaned his head down towards John, he lifted his gun and shot several rounds into the belly of this beast. There was a small explosion, and bug guts flew everywhere, mostly on John.

Standing he groaned as he dripped and squished and slipped. He had to get out of those clothes or else he'd never make it to the gate. For a moment there he considered stripping down to whatever layer of clothing that wasn't covered in orange slime, even if that meant going home naked. His bad luck turned to good as one lone wraith appeared out of the woods. Thinking fast he shot and killed the wraith without damaging his clothes too much.

The gate dialed and opened, the IDC came through announcing that is was John Sheppard and everyone let out a long sigh happy that the worst did not actually happen. It took a few moments for him to walk through the gate and when he did, he did it as slowly as possible. He wanted to make sure that no one was around or if they were, that they realized he was a friendly.

Weir started to say her welcome home speech when her words caught in her throat. "John... what are you wearing?"

"I had a little accident, and I figured that this would fit…" John began. He looked down at the clothes he was wearing. It appeared to be leather pants with a matching shirt and duster. The duster wrapped itself around his body hiding the pants that were a bit too tight.

McKay heard over the radio that John was back and came running along with Teyla and Ronon. "You're back! We were so- what on Earth?"

John just glared at McKay and walked towards the infirmary so he could shower sooner and in his eyes, that was his biggest mistake. Several of the female staff that were hanging around in the infirmary began to drool, giggle and swoon over him. Normally he wouldn't mind, in fact his ego would usually balloon and there wouldn't be an end to it for at least a few weeks, but not this time, no. His team left him behind with a bug from Hell, to get cover in slime and then he had to strip in front of a dead wraith praying that he'd stay dead. It wasn't a fun day. Though looking back on it, it was kind of fun, he smirked to himself and then watched as a group of woman turned to puddles as he made eye contact. "Hey hot stuff." One of them called.

"I'm wondering, ladies, if there was a doctor around that will help me get out of these tight clothes and into a nice hot shower…" John asked but only received sighs and giggles in response.


End file.
